Our mindset has so much power and often it’s driving the bus and we don’t even realize it. Being intentional about our mindset has the power to take a sucky day or situation and make it shine.
Remember that one time that Henry Ford said “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” – there’s so much truth here. Your thoughts have power beyond your wildest dreams. Today buckle up for some hard truths and powerful tips on why mindset matters and how to get in the drivers seat with yours.
BUT FIRST – A STORY
The other day I was skiing with Colby – if you’re new around here or you don’t follow me on instagram – first of all STOP what you are doing, head to instagram and follow @mrstracybingaman – you won’t regret it. So, if you are NOT follow me on social channels you might not know how much I love skiing. I adore skiing. It’s my favorite thing to do. I would ski all day every day all winter long, if it were feasible to do.
I have been skiing since I was 3. I skied in high school on the Skowhegan Area High School ski team, thank you very much, and, after a 7 year break while I was perpetually pregnant and nursing, I am back on snow for the second season this year and it’s bringing me all the joy!
So, back to the story – the other day I was skiing with Colby and the complaining started before we had even left the car. He was generally in a whining mood. As soon as we got on the lift his toes were cold, his fingers were cold, his nose was cold. He complained the entire first run. He didn’t want to try anything new, he didn’t want to learn a new way of turning or stopping simply because he wasn’t in the right headspace. The whole way down he was saying “I can’t” on repeat.
We went inside the lodge to warm up and I asked him – what’s the most powerful thing in your body – Your glutes! He exclaimed. There’s power in that butt muscle, mom.
Ok – touchė, kiddo – nice answer.
It’s your mind. It is SO powerful. It has the ability to make or break your hour, your day, and your entire life.
We talked about how to get into a positive mindset. I pretended there was a lightswitch on the side of his head, we counted to three and I flipped the switch. I told him now he was in a positive mindset and we headed out for run number two.
It was like he was a COMPLETELY different kid. Instead of “I can’t” when he was struggling with something he said “I’m learning” and “It’s OK to fall”. His inner dialogue had changed and the way he showed up was a 180 degree difference from the first run.
Our mind is SO powerful. If we can learn to harness its power, to start getting our mind to a place of positivity, to see the opportunities to learn and grow and to be present in the moment, it can change your life.
Here are three mindset shifts to transform your day:
POSITIVITY
Now, I’m not talking about positivity, about positive vibes only or about having expectations that EVERYTHING is going to go well, smoothly, and right 100% of the time.
I’m talking about the ability to see the good in people, in the world, and in any situation. I’m talking about ACTIVELY LOOKING for the good, identifying what you can control and putting a positive spin on things.
A positive mindset is something that it takes time to hone. You don’t wake up one day seeing everything as great.
Take a moment to tune in to how you are feeling, particularly if everything is going wrong and you are in a crappy mood, and actively look to change your mindset.
We see what we think about in the world around us. Think about what you want to see and create that energy!
GROWTH MINDSET
I’ve talked about this before – Growth Mindset – a growth mindset is the belief that you have the ability to grow and improve. You might NOT be good at cooking, but you can learn. You might be struggling to connect with one of your kids, but you can get on their level, take an interest in something that matters to them, and learn how to speak their language.
There is so much potential in the world and that same potential exists inside of you. You DO have the ability to learn new things and to see things differently.
Take a moment to think of all the things that you can do now that you had to learn. First you learned to sit up, to roll over, then to babble, then to walk, then to run, then to kick a ball, do a cartwheel, write your name, talk, and on up to drive a car. Your life, in fact, has been nothing but you learning new skills and abilities.
If you are feeling stuck, like you’ve plateaued, and haven’t been taking the time to learn. If you have lost vision for where you are going. If you need a new plan because the way that you’ve been living isn’t feeling great or fulfilling anymore, there is a 1-on-1 coaching spot with your name on it.
I work with moms just like you to create a vision for their lives, a strategic plan for how to make that vision a reality and we do a LOT of work with mindset, manifestation, momentum and mindfulness. Essentially anything that starts with an M – money, mom-life, me-time – we cover it all in coaching session that will help you to go from feeling stuck where you are, overwhelmed and overworked, to living a life that is by design. DM me on instagram @mrstracybingaman or shoot me an email to hello@fulfilledasamom.com to learn more about this opportunity to work with me!
MINDFULNESS
Mindfulness is being present in the moment you are in. It’s not worrying about the future or fretting about the past. It’s savoring and being tuned in to the sights, smells, sensations and feelings that you are having in each moment.
Mindfulness is being where your feet are planted, mind, body and soul. It’s not scrolling on your phone at the dinner table. It’s not worrying about work on your commute it. It’s not daydreaming about being somewhere else when your 1st grader is reading you a story. Mindfulness is the opposite of auto pilot.
You know, that feeling where you are driving somewhere you’ve been a thousand times and you check out mentally, your body is there, you are turning on your blinker and parking your car in the same spot as always, but your mind is somewhere else. You blink and realize that you don’t remember the last 10 minutes of your ride and you don’t know where your mind is.
Being mindful in this world where we are distracted by technology, the endless supply of domain and distraction in our pockets, the radios, the billboards, the flashing lights, the frenzied movement – training your mind to be present in the moment takes practice.
My best advice from a novice-turned intermediate meditator is to start small. Start with short duration and very limited times – find a guided meditation that you love – one of my favorite resources for this is book Breathe, Empower, Achieve by my friend Shonda Moralis.
It’s filled with 5 minute mindfulness moments that you can start to integrate throughout your day. My favorite is the body scan, the coffee meditation and the one that you use when transitioning from one activity to another. The book is linked in the show notes and the audiobook can be used as a guided meditation – you can listen to the meditation at first before you get used to the series of events.
CONCLUSION
You know the power of your glutes that Colby was talking about? Your mind has exponentially more power than those glute muscles, my love.
Harnessing the power of your mind is a lifelong journey. Be generous in grace and patient – you have these neural pathways that you have established through years and years of habits and conditioning. It’s not going to change overnight and it is SO worth it to work on being in control of your mind.
Your thoughts control your beliefs, your actions, the way you see yourself and the way you show up in the world. The best part? You get to control your thoughts. You decide what you feed your brain.
Your brain doesn’t know any better. It believes what you tell it.
If you tell your brain that you are an exhausted mom who will always ever be beyond exhausted, frayed and frazzled, rushing from place-to-place… that’s what you will believe.
If you tell your brain that you are an energetic mom who creates her own vibes, brings the joy, has all the time in the world and is good with money… that’s what you will believe and you will start acting accordingly.
It’s not magic. It’s intentional manifestation. It’s training your mind for the things that you WANT it to believe.
It’s filtering out ALL the things that society tells you and choosing what to believe.
It’s not quittte as easy as turning on or off a light switch, but by being mindful and leaning into a growth mindset, bringing the positivity and cultivating joy small changes compound over time.